12/31/2009

Feelings

Feel happy,excited, grateful, thankful....Juz feel nice and can't express my feeling by words...

Step into 2nd sem, my aim make me feel challenged yet hopefulness...

Looking back to 1st sem, I feel thankful enough...

Thank You, my Lord
for listening to my prayers
(I got JPA scholarship and my results is far more better than i predicted)
for You've strengthened my faith on You after i asked You to grant me whatever I need
for sending 'angels' to my side when my faith was shaking

Thank you,dad n mom
for what you have done for me
for praying for me, my lecturers and coursemates
And encouragements that you gave me when I was in desperation

Thanks, my bro
for your financial support and your help (haha, dun worry,bro! i will pay back the money you had given to me)

Thanks,my friends
for your help, prayer, encouragement and support...

May God bless you all abundantly...

11/20/2009

小六评审成绩放榜了!!!

昨天,家中电话忽然响起
接电话后才从堂表妹(我的阿姨嫁给我的叔叔生下的唯一女儿)的口中得知

小六评审的成绩已放榜了!!!

曾经身为补习老师的我,连忙发简讯给学生,向她们打听成绩。

就是所望之事的实低,是未见之事的确据
                希伯来书 11:1
我一直都很相信她们能考取优异的成绩。

但,

信心若是行为就是的。
           雅各书 2:17 

说起来有点惭愧,在她们面临小六评审时,别说鼓励教导、关心她们,我竟然忘了为她们祷告。。。

坦白说,

我是一位要求非常高及严厉老师,我满意的程度是甲,乙还能接受,丙呢?勉强啦~其它?!免谈!

虽然当时我考小六时的成绩不理想,但我对学生的要求非常高。所谓教不严,师之惰;然而真正的原因是收了钱。哈哈!


感到庆幸的是我所教的科目,她(薛虹)都拿甲,除了写作部分。。。

然而,


我那精灵的堂表妹(恩惠)因我入大学后少了督促,在慵懒的态度下进入考场。。。


的是什么,的也是什么。
           加拉太书 5:22

她的成绩令我蛮失望的,因我对她的期望很高。
*若没记错当时她的健康状况也不好(气喘)

她的国理、华理、华作及数得甲,其余乙,英文得丙。。。
为何她的英文得到如此成绩?扪心自问
是我忽略了吗?
是!
在四个月的补习期间,英文练习是少了点。。。
希望我下次能够平衡、完善地顾及学生所有的科目。


愿她中学生生涯能向她的大哥(征宇)一样有能力地以成绩来荣耀神。

当然,我更希望的是她能在基督里茁壮地成长,讨神的喜悦。



敬畏耶和华智慧的开端,
认识至圣者便是聪明
         箴言9:10

11/14/2009

Give thanks

The first thing i have to give thanks is i got PTPTN,finally..
Thanks God that i can survive in this sem without the loan...
My parents were not able to afford my fees in Uni as they didn't have any income; though my brother did help me a lot as he got JPA scolarship and he always spend money prudently...

Secondly,
my eldest brother and my best friend are going to marry!!!!

Thanks God!!

...a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Genesis 2:24

May God bless them abundantly…

Bless their marriage; bless their property
Bless their life; bless their job as well…

I was being touched and exited at the moment I received the news…

The scenes of playing around with my brothers during childhood appear in my mind; the time we were fighting, arguing, and mocking each other; comforting, caring and praying for each other were flashed in front of my eyes…

...

Still remember the first time I invited my best friend-Sin Yean to church…
I pray eagerly in the deep of my heart so that she will become a Christian one day...

God listened to my prayer…
She baptized and became a Christian even served as a MIF leader in church before she went to Singapore to work…

My brother fell in love with her after she had baptized…
They have been seeing each other for two and the half years…

May be it’s their time…

Thirdly,my parents got job since last two months...

Blessed is the man who perserves under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
James 1:12


Now they are staying in Mersing, Johore

11/10/2009

I can feel HIS love

After I back from the examination of The Civilization of Islam and Asia (TITAS),
my tears flow down from my eyes unconsciously...

As the love and the peace of God are surrounded me and flowing in my heart…

The spirit of praise urges me to sing and play songs by using Harmonica…

The rhythms of the songs trigger my tears to flee from confined in my eyes…

The lyrics of the songs played in my mind were reminding me how God loves me and how much His grace has shown to me…

The warm wind blew into my room through window was groping my face gently
It was like the hands of God touching and wiping off my tears which sojourn on my cheeks…

Twittering of birds came into my room through window was reverberating around my ears
It was like the whispering of God, saying “Don’t be afraid, my gal. I m with you”

His love has caused ripples to spread across the lake inside my heart without ending…


当我考完回教与亚洲文明史,
眼泪毫无意识地从眼中流下。

因神的爱与平安环绕着我,穿流于我的那已因失望而冷却的心中.

赞美之灵不断地催促着我心,
叫我唱诗及用口琴来赞美他。

诗歌的旋律促使眼泪流下,使它不再困锁于我那双狭窄的眼眶内.

感人的歌词回荡于脑海中,提醒着我神的爱与恩典多么敞阔高深.

窗外的风轻轻抚摸着我的脸,
仿佛神的双手抚摸、拭擦逗留在脸上的泪

窗外的鸟鸣声随风飘入耳中,
仿佛神在耳边轻诉,孩子别怕我就在你旁

平静的心湖因他的爱起了无数不停扩散着的涟漪。。。

11/06/2009

First week of final examination 考试第一周

2/11/09
第一天的年终考

Today is the first day of my final examination…Mathematics…


There is one question I can’t solve…Question number 4, and it takes up 36 marks…
haiz…
Feel disappointed…

I thought I m able to solve all the questions and able to get full marks in this paper, though the
fact had stirred my calm and peaceful emotion into an agitated condition…
今天考数学
一题占了36分的,不会答
难过,失望
满分梦,灭了。。。
Psalm 3
O Lord, how many are my foes!
How many rise up against me!
Many are saying of me,
“God will not deliver him.”
But you are a shield around me, O Lord
You bestow glory on me and lift up my head.
I lie down and sleep;
I wake up again, because the Lord sustains me.
I will not fear the tens of thousands
Drawn up against me on every side.
Arise, O Lord!
Deliver me, O my God!
Strike all my enemies on the jaw;
Break the teeth of the wicked.
From the Lord comes deliverance.
May your blessing be on your people.
诗篇 3篇
耶和华啊,我的敌人何其加增!有许多人起来攻击我;

有许多人议论我说:“他得不着 神的帮助。”〔细拉〕

但你耶和华是我四围的盾牌,是我的荣耀,又是叫我抬起头来的。

我用我的声音求告耶和华,他就从他的圣山上应允我。〔细拉〕

我躺下睡觉,我醒着,耶和华都保佑我。

虽有成万的百姓来周围攻击我,我也不怕

耶和华啊,求你起来!我的 神啊,求你救我!因为你打了我一切仇敌的腮骨,敲碎了恶人的牙齿。

救恩属乎耶和华,愿你赐福给你的百姓。〔细拉〕

I need to be thankful….
Thanks God that I was able to solve all the questions except one
Thanks God that I was able to sit for mathematics examination in a very good condition, no sickness
Thanks God that I am able to lay down my worries and stress to God while I was doing the mathematics paper
Thanks God that I m still breathing and able to sit for University final examination…
需感恩。。。
因:
只有一题不会,
无病无痛地考;
能考大学评审,
无担无忧地考。。。
3/11/09
第二天。。。

Today, I took ‘grammar in context’ examination…
Really “speechless” when I saw the questions…
Quite hard, though can be answered…
I didn’t really complete the essay and I wrote nonsense and craps due to the insufficient of time...
Actually, I feel regret to take grammar in context as it is really hard to score…
However, I did learn a lot…
Thanks God for letting me to have learnt a lot in grammar.
Thanks god for letting me able to answer those question.
(Although I am not sure with my answer)

"...in Me(Jesus) you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart!

I have overcome the world."

John 16:33


“。。。在我里面有平安。在世上你们有苦难,但你们可以放心,我已经胜了世界。”

约翰福音16:33

Thanks God for giving His peace in my heart…..


5/11/09 第三天


2 papers today…

Basic Food Science and Nutrition and Techniques and Skills of Study….
I don’t really know how to answer both papers….

Devastated after this...
Really worry that I have to resit Basic next year…

Really don’t want to get know juniors through this way…

两张试卷。。。

基本食物科学与营养 和 学习技能与技巧

都不会

垮了

明年需重考?!

不, 不要这样结识学弟妹们!

Lord, manifest Your mercy upon me…
神阿, 怜悯我。。。

I’ve already tried my best to study Basic…
I‘ve finished almost the whole Murano reference book which is be used for four years. I do not how to answer, though….

I am deserve to get B or B+ even A, if according to the afford I've paid...

However, I know that I will never be able to get that as I’ve got only 28% out of 50% from the previouse lecturer-Datin.
Hence, the most possible gred for me to get is C-...
努力过,
付出了;
应得的,
得不到。。。
Lord, please help me…
Reveal your justice and faithfulness…
神阿,救我吧!
彰显你的公义与信实。。。

About Technique, I left the hall one hour earlier before the exam finished…
I was exhausted and weary on that time….
Honestly, I want to get A in technique…I did studied….
Could I?
Psalm 4:1
Answer me when i call to You,
O my righteous God.
Give me relief from my distress;
be merciful to me and hear my prayer.
诗篇 4:1
显我为义的 神啊,
我呼吁的时候,求你应允我!
我在困苦中,你曾使我宽广
现在求你怜恤我,我的祷告

Relieved 松懈
Unloaded and relieved after finished 4 papers...
Even though I do not know how to do all those papers …

松懈。。。

考完四张了

呼。。。

虽都不会答


Thanks God for letting me having this kind of experience... Having the feeling of being tortured by examination…

感恩:

有机会享受被考试折腾的滋味。。。



6/11/09
第四天的时候。。。

Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,whose confidence is in Him.

He will be like a tree planted by the water

that sends out its roots by the stream.

It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit
Jeremiah 17:7-8
倚 靠 耶 和 华 ,
以 耶 和 华 为 可 靠 的 ,
那 人 有 福
他必像树栽于水旁,
在河边扎根,
炎热来到,并不惧怕,
叶子仍必青翠,
在乾旱之年毫无挂虑,
而且结果不止。
耶利米书17:7-8

Today I took philosophy examination… 30 multiple choice questions, pretty easy….

Just spend half an hour to answer it…

Once again, left the hall early and straight back to kg E…

考哲学
30简易的选择题
30分钟的解答后
提早离开考场回去
Lucky 好运
Once I reach the library bus stop, I saw E bus was arrived…
haha…
Don’t even need to wait for the bus…
不必等巴士。。。
Feel gleeful, grateful and thankful...
Got 64 over 70 for the philosophy… (maybe is the highest marks in my class/session)
Pretty sure that I can get A for this subject…

庆幸,感谢及感恩
70分得64
甲, 你是属于我的。。。


Thanks god for giving me the chance to glorify His name and lifted up my head…
Though, please get rid of my pride and arrogance...

感谢:
能荣耀神,
能抬起头。。。
但, 
除去我的骄傲与狂傲。。


Pride goes before destruction,

a haughty spirit before a fall.
Proverb 16:18


骄傲在败坏以先;
狂心在跌倒之前。
                                     箴言16:18

Examine my heart...Please reminds me to be humble and able to give all the glory to You as those are belong to You…

检查我
提醒我
使我谦卑
使你尊荣
Thanks lord!!!
You have consoled and comforted me…
Thanks for never abandon me…
Thanks for letting me feel your presence…
Thanks a lot a lot and a lot….

感谢你
从来不曾撇弃我
你同在
我衷心无尽感谢。。。

10/25/2009

It's the time...是时候了。。。

There is a time for everthing,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
凡事都有定期,天下万务都有定時
栽种有時,拔出所栽种的也有時;
拆毁有時,建造有時;
哀慟有時,跳舞有時;
怀抱有時,不怀抱有時;
保守有時,舍弃有時;
静默有時,言语有時;
争战有時,和好有時。
传道书 3:1-8  

After have been tortured for few months, it’s the time for me to let it go…

Why let it to distract myself?

The reason that I can’t cast my burden on HIM is due to that, I think…

It’s time to release, to get free…

Just feel that I am stupid enough…

The GUY in my dream doesn't equal to my dream GUY...


经过了长时间的折腾, 终于愿意放下。。。

忽然觉得自己很傻

是时候了。。。

无论我做什么,想什么, 他都不知。。。

何苦呢?

不是说好要单身吗?

为何会为自己寻找烦恼呢?

是,在没见面之前已在梦里相见。。。

但, 这并不代表是他。。。

是,母亲在还没认识父亲之前也在梦里相遇

但, 这并不代表历史会重演。。。

他已有他想要的幸福,是我所不能给的。。。

即使我能, 也不是他想要的。。。

因为对象不对。。。

为何要付出无谓的代价?

为何没人愿意为我付出?

任命吧。。。


虽然如此。。。


Blessd are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted
            Matthew 5:4
哀动的人有福了,
因为他们必得着安慰
          马太福音5:4
Thank you, Jesus...
Thank you for letting me to learn a new lesson
Thank you for reminding me about 
YOUR unbounded LOVE
Thank you for loving me
Thank you for sacrifying YOUR life 
and ransomed my life

Please, Lord...

Examine my heart
Hold me as well
Let Your wisdom 
be Bestowed upon me 
So that i'll able to testify your LOVE

谢谢你,耶稣

因为如此, 我更加体会你对我的爱

你爱我, 甚至愿意牺牲生命来赎回我

你的爱远远超过世间中的爱。。。

领导我,检察我。。。

让我能专心一志地把这爱传出去。。。


10/22/2009

...

I am lacking of motivation to study... I really have no idea regarding my mood right now...




Final is just around the corner...




I haven't started to study....




I have already plan the schedule of study, yet i can't practice it out...

21/10/09 night

I am really bad, bad and bad in English… I have already tried my best to improve my English by speaking with my friends and even think or dream in English!!!Yet i didn’t have any improvement…


The side-effect of using ineffective ways to improve English:
I found that I can’t convey my message in Chinese very well, even can’t speak Chinese fluently...I’ve forgotten a lot of specific term and descriptive words to express my feeling in Chinese… As a Chinese debater in UMS, I feel shame enough…


Now I am thinking of giving up my plan in improving English…I feel disappointed to myself…Y others can while I can’t?????What’s wrong with me???


Night always makes us recall or think about something…I really worry for the souls of my friends and relatives as the day is coming…More and more natural disasters have happened surround us recently…Really want to spread gospel to everyone in campus…But I worry that I will scare other due to my hasty...

and...


I m not showing a good testimony... My friends and seniors have always seen stress and nervous through my expression...As a Christian, I should able to put my worries before God…Really fall the glory of God and really lost the image of a Christian… Always asking others to join church and evangelize to them yet I didn’t have a good testimony in front of them… How can I serve the Lord???

somemore...

I m a pessimistic as seldom I give thanks but keep expressing my bad mood…Always emphasize those bad things happened in my daily life and ignore those good things in my life…


Lord, am I able to be your good servant? I know that willingness is crucial to get myself involve in your ministry… Lord, please examine my heart…You know that I am willing to serve you, somehow I, myself yielding to temptation, my evil behavior resulting of evil thought and sometimes even indulge myself in habitual sins...

10/20/2009

Anxiety, worry, stress

I know that I should cast all my daily worries (burden) to God, but still I m not able to do that… What is happening to me??

I am not only worrying about my own problems, yet worry about others. Even though they will never know that I m worrying about them.. I m worrying about him.. I do not know whether he is able to handle all these problems he faced..I can’t help him but pray for him…

What supposed I do in order to put off my worries?

I have been through a lot of things in these few years..Sometimes I can't even believe that I m still alive, still breathing, and still able to live in this world like others...

I feel stress and I can't feel that Lord is in my life when I woke up this morning.. Sorry, lord…I recalled the song of Grace..

I ask you how many times will you pick me up, when I keep on letting you down..
And each time I will fall short of your glory, how far will forgiveness abound?
And you answer My child, I love you, and as long as u seeking my face, you’ll walk in the p’wer of my daily sufficient grace…

How can I seek your face? My eyes have been cover by problems and I can’t even see your mercy that you have already shown upon me in my daily life, Lord… I know that you love me and so do I. Somehow I feel like I am not qualify to say that “I love U” as I keep falling your glory.. My bad attitude, my words, and my mind always sin against you…

I m lacking of motivation and I can’t focus in my studying..Really want to get an excellent result in Uni… I know my parents have a high expectation on me… I can’t disappoint them… They have been looked down by relatives, friends even colleagues just because of their low education level…They are not deserve to be looking down by others as what were they today is the consequences of scarifying for their family…

Lord, please guide me… Please grant me the wisdom that I need as u had granted to Solomon…

Oh, that You will bless me enlarge my territory, let Your hand be with me and keep me from harm so that I will free from pain…

10/19/2009

i need to settle down!!!!!!

Have been a long long long long time didn't write blog... do not know why.. Just feel lazy...Sorry to those whom concern about me...Erm.i haven't settle down in a church since i came here...i have been to 8 churches whithin these few months.. Methodist, Christ The King, Grace Chaper, GCC, Hope, Skyline, Likas Baptist Church and Basel ...haiz...Please pray for me..I really wanna to settle down in a church so that i can serve Him.. Besides, i really have the burden to evangelise in campus.. haha.. i keep inviting my friends to church recently (even my seniors)..Pray for me so that God will grant me the wisdom i need..Thanks....God bless...

8/26/2009

The Guy in my dream

Now i m obliged to study or revise sensory because have exam tomorrow...However, i keep thinking of "that"... i hate for my inept in handling "that".

Yesterday morning, i met him again..Actually i was late to catch the bus on that time ..Usually i go to bus stop by 6:45am but i was over slept and it was 7:15am when i got into the bus. Due to my lateness, i didn't get a sit in the bus...I was standing on the bus and reading "Our Daily Bread" along the way from Kg to DKP... i didn't realized he was in the bus too...After the bus reached DKP's bus stop i met my course mate and i discussed the report with her...Just before we end our conversation, he was appeared and said Hi to my course mate, he doesn't know me but he did looked at me...

*For extra information: In the first day of lecture, He entered my class. I knew he was looking at me for few minutes (i was learning Korea from my friend on that time and i was very excited since i can learn one more language) ..

His appearance really surprised me and i had didn't see him for almost two weeks and i almost forgot about him after being busy in preparing mid-term examination in these two weeks...i do not what is the reason for me to have that chance to meet him once i have kept him away from my mind...This cause me unable to forget him...

Actually i do not know why i've put all of my attention on him. (he is the distraction for me in doing everything)..

Everything starts just because of that dream...In my dream, he was teaching and guiding me after i asked him some academic questions...After i woke up, i could still remember every scene in my dream clearly...Not only that, that dream makes me recalled the dream that i had had before i entered Uni..Before i came to Sabah, I dreamt a guy whom stared at me and he look sad, desperate and down...i do not know who was that guy since I’ve never met him...After i had the second dream (in uni), i realized that he was the guy!!!!How strange is it!!!

However, i tried to analyze the second dream by using my logical thinking...Then, i found some reasons to explain why i had that dream. First, i felt insecure in this campus as i was still blur and unfamiliar with the environment of this campus.. Secondly, he is a very good guy and by the time i wish to be a very very good person in front of people in order to glorify God's name...

However until now, i still cannot understand why this dream has engraved in my mind? Not only that, i was started admiring with his abilities and his humility...

I really hope that i am able put him away from my mind, though i wish to meet him again...I really do not know how to deal with this..

Some worlds came across in my mind:
"It's normal to develope a realtionship with a guy in University..."
"You are so traditional and conservative, if you do not date one partner during university...."
"Don’t regret after you have missed the greatest opportunity given...”

Lord, are those(including the dreams) the lies of devil?You know my intention, Lord...You know that I have to strive for excellent in my result in order to get JPA;as You know that the situation of my family...

Oh, father Lord, please guide me, lead me,and hold me as well...You are the One whom know my needs... You know what is the best for me...Please protect me and keep me from harm... Please always remind me what I've promised to you when i was 18...Please let me able to keep the covenant that I've made in front of You... In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

7/30/2009

Cried

Finally i cried this morning.....I really wanna to cry since Wednesday after i had been staying in library for six hours in editing our group assignment that we have to hand up by today....
Why i wanna to cry?
No other reasons but tired and stress...
Why i cannot cry when i wanna to cry?
No other reasons but too tired and no more energy for crying...
Initially i thought i will cry in the first week of being in UMS, but i never thought i can be such strong...
I had been facing a lot of trouble and problems last few weeks...I believe that if those incidents that i had faced happen to others, they will start to express their depression by crying ...But thanks God, i didn't cry but i able to joke and entertain my friends with my problems...
Why I can cry this morning?
No other reasons but i cannot answer my grammar quiz yesterday...I have done my revision, but i unable to answer...I will fail this quiz...haiz...
Really hope God will show his mercy upon me...

7/04/2009

Orientation week in UMS

This week is really an exhausted week...Woke up at 4am ang slept at 2am..Just slept 4 2 hours..Really can't imagine i m still alive after being torturing 4 almost a week..I never thought tat i can be a very tough and independent girl...As u know i came here alone,without accompanied by parents even friends...i have faced a lot of problems in the registration day in UMS, though i had solved all my prblems i faced by praying and calling to my brother(Jit Yo)..really appreciate 4 everything he've done 4 me...I know a lot of new friends from different states (got chinese,malay,dusun,kadasan,iban...)

Now i miss my dog...feel curious,rite?i didn't miss my parents but miss my dog(Vim)...haha...Act, no other reason just because "he" can't chat to me..i can call my parents when i miss them,but i can't call Vim when i miss "him"....haha..

Anyway,i know i have to face a lot of challenges in uni life...Just hope that i can be strong enough no matter in mentally or physically...

6/22/2009

Preparations for the life in uni

i never thought that my money that i earned last few months will be spent in just three days..i spent RM219.5 to buy the ticket from KL to KK.I also spent about RM2000 in paying the tuition fee and photostatting those documents.Not only that, i am going to spend RM2450 to buy a laptop(Toshiba Satellite L310)...i know the money i spent is worth to spend,but when the number in my account book is decreasing, i feel anxious enough...i worry about the life in uni,cause i have not enough money to survive in uni...haizzzz.....

i have not pack my belonging that need to bring to Sabah...Just feel lazy to do it...

6/19/2009

感恩

我真的很感谢神让我可以进入大学。。。虽然不是我最想要的大学,虽然需要乘坐飞机才能到达的大学,虽然没有同学跟我读同一间的大学。。。但是我依然感谢上帝章显他的慈爱在我的身上,让我能感受到神是与我同在的、从都没有离弃我的。。。因为他应允我的祈求让我能读我想要读的课系--Food science。。。


我现在别无他求,只希望神赐给我聪明智慧及健壮的身体。。。我真的不希望历史重演(考试时生大病)。。。


我听我哥说,我这次必须自己照顾好我自己。。。不是他不想照顾我,而是他没办法照顾。。。因为大学范围很大,他在西边,我在东边。。。课系又不同,见面的机会是等于零。。。更何况我将会很忙(因为food science很难读,跟medic有得比),所以连抽时间出来见面都难。。。


我哥对我的大学生活感到悲观。。。而我对我的大学生活没有期待、没有担忧,我只包着平常心去看待我的大学生活。。。

6/13/2009

Genting


8th-10th of Jun, I and my family were stayed in Genting Highland with my uncle's family...Nine of us were stayed over night in Awana hotel..



There is not as cold as i thought... And there is the suitable habitat for mosquitoes due to the moderate temperature...Luckily i brought Allano lotion(Amway product which can prevent your sweet blood being donated to mosquitoes )...Initially, my mum said Genting is quite cold and there might be no mosquitoes...But for the sake of my skin(if there is too cold, it might dry up my skin), i decided to bring it there(to moisturise my skin)...





We reached there at around 5pm... Once i reach there,i was accompanied by my two cousins to swim in the swimming pool...





On the second day morning, i went for a walk in the garden which is one the facilities in the hotel...






After the lunch, we(my father,brother and three cousins)were going to the top of the Genting Hill by cable car...That was my first time to take cable car...However it was not as exciting as i thought...we were wasting an hour to Q...and when i got in site the cable car,i started feeling faint...Haizz....




On the third day,after check out,we found that 11 cups of pudding left in the fridge...We were trying to get it back,but we fail...Haizzz

6/12/2009

难熬的会经过的

最近发现我喜欢上 "快乐一家“的主题曲。


原因是我对这首歌的最后一句歌词有所感触 ——
“难熬的会经过的”
不知道是不是我觉得最近的生活很难熬,还是我一直无法忘记我曾难熬的日子。。。
由于这首歌并不是完全表达我内心的感受,所以我去把它的歌词改掉,让我可以好好抒发我内心的情感——
伤心回忆想几遍了 你的眼还是红红的
生命总要些苦难 现在不过多了一个
捱过了何必再想着 有些事总该遗忘的
着又哭了 我明白的
谁都难以释怀
别再哭了 多不值得
笑一笑把难过变坚强
生活苦涩 让你坚强
一切苦难 将会变成过去
别再哭了 多不值得
失去也是另一种获得
伤心回忆 不属你的
一切苦难 将会变成过去
难熬的 会经过的
*To:写这首歌词的人
Sorry,乱改你的歌词,希望你别介意。。

The words from the bottom of my parents’ heart....

Dad told me that every one is looking down on him including his own children


I know dad always have a sense of inferiority due to his low education level...Sometimes,when we are impatient to explain something to him,we will say:"Aiyoh!u won't understand la...It is not as easy as u think la!"..of course sometime we are not listen to him...The words that uttered from our mouth and the attitude we've shown to him have triggered him to think that way... Actually we didn't mean anything...we didn't despise him...However we have already hurt his heart deeply...



Mom told me that she wish God to mold and prune her children


Recently she feel very disappointed to us..Just because of my brother is in a relationship with a non-christian girl...Mom said, she have no right to choose our partner for us, but what she wish is we will be the one whom God pleased...I know she is very sad and hard to accept the choice that my brother've made and i know that she has also no any expectation with the guy i'll choose in the future too..
However i insist that i will choose a christian guy to be my life partner, but still i have can't assure that i will do exactly what i insisted to...


Both of my parents feel sad for us because they are not willing to see any bad thing happens to us...They don't want us to be hurt...So, they feel that they are the most failure parents in the world due to us didn't listen to them...

5/30/2009

亲爱的阿爸天父:

我爱你。我也知道你对我的爱多过我对你的爱。我知道最近我远离了你。我已经有一个星期没和父母亲一同唱诗祷告(因为我沉迷于LOST这部电影)。我也知道这个星期我犯下很多有心、无心的过犯。因为在我心情很低落、烦燥时,我不回应我父母对我说的话,甚至连看都不看他们一眼。可是我却没有为我犯下的错向你认罪祷告。对不起,求你赦免我。


昨天,爸爸散到腰了。痛得他无法站太久,整个人必须斜着来走路。他的情况就像妈妈一样。我不知道你要我们这一家学习什么功课。爸爸已经被人欺负到无法申冤的地步了,他还必须忍受和妈妈一样的病痛?!我真的很怕父母亲有一天会痛到无法行走。上帝,你知道他们还必须为你作工,他们还没有为你建立合乎你心意的教会。神啊,求你医治他们!我求你。


前天,大哥在病倒了,无法工作。不过我很感谢你垂听我的祷告,医治了他,让他今天可以返回工作岗位。


神啊,你是不是要我改过,所以允许让这些事情临到我的家人身上呢?如果是这样,我愿意改过,我愿意帮爸爸舀沟渠的水去浇菜,我愿意帮妈妈做任何她吩咐我做的事情,我愿意听从他们所说的话。我希望你能医好爸爸妈妈身上的病痛。我希望你的荣耀彰显在他们身上。


神啊,求你按你的旨意行事。甚愿你赐福于我们一家,扩张我们的境界,常与我们同在,保佑我们不遭患难不受艰苦。阿们!

5/26/2009

The reason

There is a lot of trials and disasters in our life.. Those unfortunate come without any sign..It's out of our control..I know this called life...


Many things happened last year....I really want to write it down....But i felt confused...Every time I recall those events that happened in my family, my tear will roll down unconsciously...


Actually i don't know how to start to write..Maybe I need some time to rearrange those events...I don't know...


"Tears may fall through the night,joy comes with the morning" this is wat I hope for....

5/24/2009

期待

不知为什么最近想要用华语来表达我的心情,可能是因为这几天接触的都是中文书。(这几天从网上看了几篇小说,各种类型的小说。。)



我很期待冷气的到来。。。昨晚我简直无法入眠,被那闷热的空气笼罩着我的身体,导致体内的水分不断从毛孔排出,弄得我全身粘嗒嗒的,很不舒服。搞得我整晚辗转难眠。。。



我很期待钢琴的到来。。。我知道我的父母很想要开办教会,所以我想用我这几个月打工的钱来买。虽然我很想用这笔钱来买电脑,以备我上大学所需,但我深知若我以神的国为先,神必定为我预备我的一切所需。。。



我很期待文章的完成。。。我正在修改一篇文章,故事是关于已一个失明将近十年的女生。。。同时我也在写关于我家人的故事 。。。

我很期待神给的异象。。。真的真的很期待。。。

5/23/2009

苦难中的甘甜

这个星期我忙着帮我的六叔“看”书。我是他的新书《青蛙睡在鞋子里》的第一个读者。我帮他改过文章上的错字等等。。。


这个星期也是我所有的补习学生难熬的一周,他们必须面对年中考。。。虽然如此,我人觉得我比他们紧张多了,压力多了。。。我不断地提醒他们在家要温书,也额外多加时间教他们补习;同时我也不断默默为他们祈祷,只盼他们能考取理想的成绩。。。忽然觉得我会那么地紧张是因为我怕被家长们认为我是个无能的老师。。。“拿人钱财替人消灾”这句话不断地浮现在我的脑海。。。


我和我的父母已经住在吧生接近五个月了,父母依然没有薪水,靠的是一些教会兄弟姐妹的奉献;靠的是神的恩典。。。父母也很难适应吧生的天气,时常失眠,尤其是我的父亲。他简直无法忍受这里闷热的空气。。。他常常嚷着要安装冷气,但由于屋主(六叔)不同意,他简直不能对这间屋子动任何手脚。。。这就是寄人篱下的痛苦了。。。今天,我听到了一个好消息。有人会送冷气给我父母哦!虽然还没送来,不过我相信我的六叔不可能会连送来的冷气也拒之以外吧!希望今晚我的父亲能安然好睡,不再会被闷醒。。。


虽然这几个月我父母没有薪金可领,但我一直看到神的恩典在我们的身上章显。。。我心依然感谢神让我们遇到在人眼里看为苦难的事情。。。

5/01/2009

Patience is a plaster for all sores.忍耐可以减轻一切痛苦

Why i never get excellent result in any examination!!!!!!!!!



Sometimes i am looking for some evasions to explain why i never get full As in Government examination...


That is:


  • I didn't have a stable and good environment to study. Because i have transferred to different schools since i was studying in kindergarten. Every time was transferred to different state..
    From SRJK(C) Kahang,Johor (Yeart 1 to Year 3) to SJK(C) Yue Min,Sabah (Year 4 to Year 6) ...After that, my family moved from Sabah to Klang,Selangor..So, i study Form 1 in SMJK Chung Hwa,Klang.After one year,i have transferred to SMJK NAN HWA, Sitiawan of Perak(Form 2 to Upper 6) ...


  • I didn't have a good language foundation due to the lousy teachers in my primary school..


  • I never attend tuition class(except the MUET tuition class)


However, i know that the actual reason is i was not hardworking enough and i was lazy..



I could still remember the passion before i entered Form Six... i had made a plan for my life....i told to myself,parents and God that i must get 4 flat in STPM...i was believing that by the power of God i can do everything...Cause there is nothing impossible in God....




In upper six,i had to be independent...my parents had moved to KL due to the job...i have to take care of myself... But i don't know how to take care of myself....I fell sick almost every months...I still could remember that i can't attend the mid-year exam because i was sick...After that,the most unlucky thing happens to me!!!
I was infected by dengue during the trial...I was depressed enough on that time....seems like i could not do anything except lied on the bed...
I just pray earnestly,i tried my best to memorize what i have been read and study before...Haizzz
In conclusion, i have been a very bad and unlucky year in upper six...




However i had experienced the mercy, grace and love from the almighty God...




Actually, i deeply understand that God has his purpose on everyone of us...I didn't get full As doesn't mean that i m not the good one,isn't?

3/30/2009

My life in the first three months of 2009

Have a period of time didn't write blog.....This is because i had been very busy in the last few months...

In the month of Jan,i tried my best to apply to be Guru Sandaran in the primary school of CHUEN MIN,Klang...However due to my absence to the meeting, they didn't accept me...(Actually on that time i was stayed in Sitiawan to move my things to Klang).

Before CNY, i received a call from PPD of Klang who asked me to work as Guru Sandaran in SRJK(C)Yuk Ying ,Kapar...Walauye, the school very far from my house!I need to drive about 20minutes to reach the school from my house...Not only that,i have to jam for 30 minutes on the way to the school...Haizz...so i give up to work there...

After CNY, i recieved another call from PPD...This time they asked me to work in SRJK(C) Pandamaran A as Guru Ganti..Initially i thought the salary of Guru Ganti is same as Guru Sandaran,so i accepted the job...After i went to the school and met the principal,i discovered that the salary is different!!!!


KLUONG!!!!!(a lightning bolt)

The salary of Guru ganti is counted by day...About Rm35 per day and not included holiday and weekend...My salary is very low(compared to Guru Sandaran) and i had had in charge of many things because i was the class teacher of 3P...I had to wake up at 5.30am and must be in the school at 6.45am (in school days)...In the afternoon i had to teach tuition in my house until night....How "meaningful" of my life...I spent my time by working and sleeping in the whole month of Feb...

In the end of Feb, i decided to resign the job...After i informed the principal, she tried to "detain" me....haha!!!That means i am "useful" lo.Isn't?Due to my responsibility to the pupils of my class, i decided to work for another two weeks until 13th of Mac..

Huh,after resign , i felt relax enough...Because i just need to teach tuition class and spent my time to do my favor things...


After i spent my time like a lotus eater for almost a week, something happened in my life....

I still remember in the night of 23th of March(about 7.45pm),a white puppy intruded my life...In the first sight i saw it, i wished to name it as BOLT(the name of the puppy in Disney movie)..Because the puppy looks similar as the Bolt...It whole body covered with white fur,even its eyebrow,eyelash and nail is white in colour! Really can't imagine!!!I love the dog very much...On that night,i stayed up all night to think a name for my puppy...




Ace
Bright
Bold
Bolt
Ice
Milk
Snowy
Soya
bean
Vim
Zappy





After considering the term of meaning and pronunciation...Finally, i choose Vim... The meaning of "Vim" is ebullient vitality and energy...

1/07/2009

父亲的泪

在我的记忆中,好像没见过我父亲的泪。

经过那么多的风风雨雨,只曾看见父亲用手揉揉那已湿透眼睛,深怕被我们看见他的泪似的。

看到这种的情景更加让我感到难过。。。

有时,甚至希望父亲能大胆地把心中的委屈化成泪水流出来。

看着他那么辛苦的忍着,我的心几乎快粹了。 

为什么他要这样委屈的忍下别人对他的偏见,欺负?

为什么他就是那么的博爱,不理会别人如何的对待,依然能在祷告中祝福他们?

为什么他就是那么爱装成一幅坚强的样子,说着烂笑话,扮可爱,在我们面前开怀大笑?

虽然我知道他之所以这样做事为了不要把事情闹大,不想主的名受到羞辱,不想让我们担心。。。

明明心里正在淌血,却不敢表露出来。。。

只是在跟别人分享的当儿,才看见痛苦,无奈,悲伤显在他的脸上,也没看见他的泪。。。

可能对男人而言,流泪是需要很大的勇气。